


Who Wants to be a Galdionare?

by Tormented_Gale



Category: Tales of Destiny, Tales of the Abyss
Genre: Gen, Jade and Anise are best hosts, game show au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-30
Updated: 2014-10-30
Packaged: 2018-02-23 04:57:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,553
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2534987
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tormented_Gale/pseuds/Tormented_Gale
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tumblr Prompt: Abyss characters of your choosing at a quizshow with quizmaster Jade and co-moderator Anise</p><p>I added a few characters from other Tales of games, hence the added tags.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Who Wants to be a Galdionare?

He smiles like a shark and talks like a nobleman and walks like confidence bows to him alone. She smiles like an innocent child and talks like a wizened brat and walks like - no, she  _struts_. There is no spear in his hand, no doll on her back, yet they are clearly known to this audience, who raises cheers at the mere sights of their shadows. The cameras are on, the lights flicker to life, and in three…

two…

one…

It’s showtime.

"Welcome to another edition of - "

There’s a drumroll, and there’s another internal countdown, but it’s faster, like the beating of a racing heart. The crowd shouts the name, louder than any announcer, which is why he doesn’t bother with it. 

"WHO WANTS TO BE A GALDIONARE!?"

As the two hosts make their way to their seats, raised on a dais so they can look down at the contestants, he smirks, she smiles, and the crowd goes wild.

Five spotlights go on, revealing five people standing at their own stations. Before each of them is a large, red button that says ‘Push me!’ in curling font. More than one gives the button a dubious look.

"Welcome, welcome," the long haired announcer’s voice booms, and more than one shriek can be heard from the crowd. "I am Jade Curtiss, host of Who Wants to be a Galdionare. This is my co-host - "

The girl strikes a pose, her head tilted to the side and pigtails bouncing with the motion, “Anise Tatlin! Are you ready to meet our contestants?”

"This young man hails from the country of Fitzgald. He’s a strong warrior with a heart of gold - Stahn Aileron!"

The first spotlight focuses, and a camera zooms in, and the young man beams a smile for all to see. On his back is an enormous sword, unhidden by his mop of bright blond hair. He waves enthusiastically. The crowd goes wild, claps and cheers and not a jeer on any lip.

"Next," Anise picks up, "is another warrior, but he’s a bit of a sourpuss. From the Kingdom of Seinegald, Leon Magnus!"

He too is soon awash in bright, bold light, but his features hold only a scowl, and his dark hair hides the rest of his expression. Still the crowd swoons, and Stahn grins, and elbows the other boy with a swift jab.

"I didn’t know you were going to be on the show!" Stahn laughs, and the crowd laughs with him.

"It wasn’t exactly my choice," Leon grumbles, but the microphones pick up all, and there is no need for a laugh track. He crosses his arms over his chest. "Let’s get this over with."

"So enthusiastic!" Jade says perhaps too sarcastically - Leon glares - and continues. "From the Kingdom of Kimlasca, a redhaired ambassador who is still learning the meaning of the word, Luke fon Fabre!"

Luke basks in the light, his too-long hair brushing over his back with every movement of his head, and he waves to the crowd excitedly.

"My future hus - " Anise begins, but is quickly interrupted.

"Not going to happen!" Luke shouts. "I’m making this gald and using it to help Master Van!"

Both Jade and Anise roll their eyes, but this is a show to be watched and played, not argued during. 

"Two more to go, folks! We have a real treat for you tonight. Also from the Kingdom of Kimlasca, a man who may look familiar to you, but rest assured, he is anything but like his ambassador counterpart! Please welcome Asch the Bloody!"

If anyone can scowl more deeply than Leon, it’s Asch. And at the moment, that’s a contest in and of itself. He glares at his almost identical replica every few moments and keeps his arms crossed over his chest.

"What?! Since when does Asch get to play too?" Luke demands.

"Since you don’t know anything, dreck. Someone has to represent our series with pride."

"Hey!"

Before it can get out of hand, Jade adds, “And last but certainly not least, an imposing figure who seems to have some rather nefarious plans in the works. You know him, you love him - three time Galdionare champion - Vandesdelca Grants!”

Brown hair tied back in a spiky ponytail, eyebrows so thick that they appear to have minds of their own, Van raises his hand in a simple greeting, his smile locked in place and menacing. Luke looks like he might start praising him; Asch looks like he might jump the short distance to kill him.

"Now! Onto the rules!" Anise held up her finger, pointing at the ceiling. "Each question is worth a different amount of money depending on the difficulty of it. Whoever has the most money at the end of each round starts the next one, until you hear this noise - " A rappig’s loud snort echoes through the studio. " - which signals the final round! If you think you know the answer, smack the button in front of you! Are you ready?!"

"Can we drop out?" Leon asks with a frown.

"Certainly," Jade answers, "but know that there are consequences."

For the first time the contestants look at each other nervously - except Van Grants, who calmly watches the screens ahead that will display the questions.

"Consequences?" Stahn repeats.

"Oh yes. You’ll be thrown into the Mystery Pit."

The crowd lets out a loud ‘Ooooh!’ and the questions from the contestants suddenly stop. Jade gives them all a smile that shows too many teeth and waves his hand at the screen. “Please show the first category! You will be able to hit your buzzer only after I finish reading the question.”

"Get on with it!" Asch snarls.

Jade bows his head and chuckles to himself as the screen blinks and upon it appears “Swordians”.

"What the hell is a Swordian?" Luke demands, but his question is a mere outburst in a deathly silence, and it goes unanswered.

"How many Swordians exist in total at the start of  _Tales of Destiny_?”

As the last ‘y’ rolls off his tongue, three buzzers are slammed, but only one is lighting up. Van stands up proudly, and much to the surprise of the other contestants, answers, “Five.”

"That is correct!"

"Master! You’re so smart!"

"Shut up, dreck!"

The next category appears - “Villains” - and Van smiles and Asch scowls and Luke cocks his head. Stahn leans on his podium and looks pleased while next to him Leon has his forehead pressed to the side of the button. If the crowd were to listen close enough, they could make out the faint groan he lets out in frustration.

"What is the name of this villain?" Anise shouts.

On the screen, a boy with ridiculously spiked green hair is shown, though his face is hidden in the shadow of a golden, red mask. His clothing is black and green, and Asch hits the button so hard Jade swears he hears it crack. But once again, Van’s button glows.

"Sync, of course," Van sighs as if it’s all so easy. 

As the rounds go on - “Replica.” “What’s a replica?” “It’s not from our game, so it doesn’t matter.” “They knew what a Swordian was, though.” “Only the guy on the end.” “Would you two shut up?!” “Yeah!” “I refuse to agree with you, dreck!” “What, afraid I’m right?” “That doesn’t make any sense!” - a pattern emerges. Van is easily winning and the other contestants ban together to defeat him.

It feels strangely rigged. Though they don’t know it, this is the consensus feeling of the other four, some of whom subtly look to Van while others straight up suspiciously glare. Jade hums a jaunty little tune to himself as Anise places her hands on her hips and, again, tells Van, “Correct!”

The rappig snorts, and the other contestants grown, and Van simply smiles. He leans forward and glances at the other four, the cat that swallowed the canary, and says simply, “You stand no chance. Give up now.”

"I wanted to leave ages ago," Leon grumbles, and lets out a pained gasp when Stahn roughly smacks him in the back.

"Oh, come on, it’s been fun!" Stahn announces and grins. "We should’ve tried to get on this show sooner!"

"I didn’t want to be here in the first place," Leon snaps and goes back to ignoring his button.

Near them Luke and Asch glare at each other, refusing to actually admit that, yes, they both suspect their Master and, no, agreeing on anything is allowed only in that circumstance. They can never agree. It’s in their contracts.

Jade clears his throat, and the screen briefly goes black. He announces, “The final category is - “

All that appears on the screen is the word ‘Birds’. All of the contestants, minus Leon, blink and stare. Even Van looks marginally confused, as if this was an unexpected turn of events.

"Ready?" Jade asks, and immediately continues with, "What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen garuda?"

There’s an actual, physical pause. Then the contestants erupt into various shouts and incoherent words. Even Van, who now looks outraged, demands an explanation, while Stahn writes into the podium with his sword to try and figure it out.

"Commercial break?" Anise asks with a giggle. Jade smiles down at her before looking into the camera.

"We’ll be right back after these messages!"


End file.
